Pink Fire Pointer February 2011
I present you not with presidents today, but rather a 2-for-1: the first in both the Notorious Lovers and Bangable Brüdern series. Thanks to Tyler for the initial Bosie tip.

HISTORIC BONER(S) NO. 17 Lord Alfred "Bosie" Douglas (left), poet, and Francis Douglas, Viscount Drumlanrig (right), politician

The Evidence:

* Of other people

The Douglas family was a piece of work. Their grandfather died in a reported shooting accident, which many believed to have been a cover for suicide. One of their uncles died during the first ascent of the Matterhorn (a rumored homicide), while another committed suicide by slitting his throat (only years after attempting to abduct a little girl). Their father accused both Bosie and Oscar Wilde of sodomy, a criminal offense in Britain at the time, which prompted such endearing father-son exchanges as "I detest you," "you miserable creature," and "I cried over you the bitterest tears a man ever shed, that I had brought such a creature into the must be demented." And to top that off, Francis died at the age of 27 in a mysterious hunting accident, which may or may not have been a suicide or homicide.

And, oh wait, I hate Troy Aikman. His image is now ruining this moment for me. -40.0.

That said, I want to thank Thea and her blogmates for bringing to my attention "The Pocket Book of Boners." Illustrated by Dr. Seuss.

Next Time: An American Chemist and Photographer
AND the dudes are back! I'm not sure to whom I ought to attribute this tip, other than to a Jezebel thread. Email me if he was your idea!

HISTORIC BONER NO. 16 Zhou Enlai, First Premier of the People's Republic of China

The Evidence:
Come on, guys, tomorrow's Valentine's Day. You know you'd rather be cozying up with the "midwife" of the Great Leap Forward than with your boyfriend/girlfriend/cat.

And I know I'm mispronouncing his surname. I cite poetic license.

Next Time: A Notorious Lover, No. 1 (we're making this a series, guys...)
'Tis that time of year when the enterprising young ladies of America enable my gluttony. And so, with a mouthful of Girl Scout cookies, I present the first in the long-awaited series:

BANGABLE DAME NO. 1 Juliette Gordon Low, founder of the Girl Scouts

The Evidence:

More on the first two points: Juliette and her husband, William, were nearing divorce when he died in 1905, so perhaps her plight in being a single woman was not as trying as for some. However, William apparently left his entire estate to another woman, to which Juliette (later) replied, "No one was going to get away with that!" She fought the system and homegirl took back $500,000, even though it was in settlement money. Bitch still got some of her green, I guess.

Next Time: Communist China