tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14174843523097929492024-03-21T02:22:38.895-07:00Sonny ZinhtetAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comBlogger26125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-74869023841547859632011-09-25T19:19:00.000-07:002013-06-21T09:11:34.187-07:00<div style="text-align: justify;">My apologies, friends. Work has been all-consuming, as have been my post-work naps. But thanks be to <a href="http://toomuchrad.tumblr.com/">Milo</a> for providing the steely-eyed fodder that inspired the completion of another post.</div><br /><b>HISTORIC BONER NO. 22</b> Sir Henry Wellcome, American-British pharmaceutical entrepreneur<br /><br /><b>The Evidence:</b><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjL29Vtk7XG9VYTy64IulMGrhjFVVHFdqWgn5X_Fr6MjQUYPhnmYZGy4gt9tbjtUnWCktj75Fqz2kQepC8WoAfBq2z7_TJA9A_C32Xc2CdWbW2n0-yc09pnQdLbE7LcR14_bpWsTPZ7Tl0/s1600/Picture+1.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjL29Vtk7XG9VYTy64IulMGrhjFVVHFdqWgn5X_Fr6MjQUYPhnmYZGy4gt9tbjtUnWCktj75Fqz2kQepC8WoAfBq2z7_TJA9A_C32Xc2CdWbW2n0-yc09pnQdLbE7LcR14_bpWsTPZ7Tl0/s1600/Picture+1.png" /></a></div><br /><div style="text-align: justify;">It should come as no surprise (to me) that following some actual research—beyond my ever-so-thorough aesthetic analyses of portraits—I found Sir Wellcome to be rather unattractive in character. The man and his life were a series of contradictions: a trained pharmacist who made his fortune from the packaging of drugs rather than from their effectiveness; a “devoted” father who temporarily abandoned his son at the age of three because he was “sickly;” a fundamentalist Christian with some freaky preferences in the bedroom (though--perhaps--that should come as no surprise). Case in point: Henry’s habit of (allegedly) beating his wife with a cattle whip, even when she was with child. And the fact that he once employed a labor force of 3,000 to dig up (and, essentially, loot) artifacts from Sudan for the build-up of his personal collection, perhaps resulting from an inferiority complex derived from his, well, inferior beginnings. BUT I was too far along in my "process" to abandon the subject (read: I had finished reading his Wiki page), and if I’ve included Stalin here, well then I can’t deny the man who founded the richest charity in the United Kingdom. And then there’s that whole HIV/AIDS treatment thing. So, you know.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">FYI, a few of <a href="http://www.wellcome.ac.uk/Funding/Biomedical-science/Funding-schemes/WTX033549.htm">these</a> Sir Henry Wellcome Postdoctoral Fellows are quite easy on the eyes, as well. If only I were intelligent, I could infiltrate the system and find myself a hot researcher boyfriend. Because that's the only reason to pursue a postdoc. <b><i>Obviously.</i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"> Welcome to my logic.</span></b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">And can you believe I went the whole entry without even mentioning <a href="http://library.wellcome.ac.uk/node615.html">this mustache</a>?</div><br /><b><i>Next Time:</i></b> A Welsh sailorAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-5642923444323122332011-08-30T19:19:00.000-07:002013-06-21T09:11:34.171-07:00<div style="text-align: justify;">See, I'm not a total liar (this time). We be making this jawn weekly. I'd also like to give a shoutout to Luisa for providing the visual fodder for this week's speci(wo)men. And though I said she was going to be an archaeologist, like a dickweed asshole I dropped that piece for someone hotter, because I'm superficial like that. And I pretend to know my (critical?) straight male audience, if it even exists.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>BANGABLE DAME NO. 3</b> Teresa Wilms Montt, Chilean poet</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>The Evidence:</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgL80RRJxqAW8ZompmWtszT0cwSJOvTJJwt7RyQGW2rl5_oFA3VVtootqmYthutLImE9MeReVw4JtypWb_fJODvpqditGA-RJ41KIusL_h6FWDalRFYV4sz41GvGB1glAuifyNyTcso2bU/s1600/Picture+6.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: justify;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgL80RRJxqAW8ZompmWtszT0cwSJOvTJJwt7RyQGW2rl5_oFA3VVtootqmYthutLImE9MeReVw4JtypWb_fJODvpqditGA-RJ41KIusL_h6FWDalRFYV4sz41GvGB1glAuifyNyTcso2bU/s1600/Picture+6.png" /></a></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>So</i>......we all might have to take the facts I've collected with a grain of salt, as Google provided some rather poorly translated biographies and I (very practically) took German in high school. <i>Tut mir leid</i>. What I could determine was that Teresa was born into a prominent Chilean family, but abandoned the life of the bourgeoisie for a pursuit of anarchism, feminism, Freemasonry, and poetry. Her husband caught her cheating on him...with his cousin. So he threw her in that convent, even though he was a gambling, alcoholic twat. And following her <i>Midnight Express</i>-like escape (I don't know, I'm just making that up), Teresa was mistaken for a German spy whilst trying to join the Red Cross as a nurse during WWI. Though she was able to publish frequently enough, it was probably her unhappiness stemming from the limited visitations she had with her two daughters and her depression that caused Teresa to commit suicide at the age of 28. Her life demonstrates the limitations of even an educated woman at the turn of the last century. As does the epic of Rose DeWitt Bukater. Totally fair and historically correct comparison.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">I can't forget to mention that Teresa was allegedly bumping uglies with <a href="http://es.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ram%C3%B3n_Mar%C3%ADa_del_Valle-Incl%C3%A1n">this stud</a>. You get it, girl.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">Oh, and that Cheetah Girl thing is supposed to say "embrace the reference," but Daytum can be so difficult to work with/my process of creating and editing infographics is so ghet-to.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><b><i>Next Time:</i></b> An American-British entrepreneurAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-69639914576351526912011-08-22T23:42:00.000-07:002013-06-21T09:11:34.182-07:00<div style="text-align: justify;">I'm starting a <a href="http://twitter.com/#!/bangabledudes">Twitter account</a> because some people told me I should. I'm also starting a <a href="http://www.facebook.com/pages/Bangable-Dudes-in-History/250476708318549">Facebook page</a> even though I hate Mark Zuckerberg in light of Jesse Eisenberg's (obviously) infallible portrayal of him in <i>the Social Network</i>. I swore never again to join Facebook when I deleted my personal account in 2005, but that just proves how weak my personal convictions are.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">With this, I pledge to update more often. I also pledge to tweet regularly about my favorite "articles" from the Daily Mail and Dlisted. Except all stories relating to the Kardashian wedding, because that dude is fugly and I'm over it already. Been over that shit since the OJ trial/before that bitch was born.</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-76433177745585331072011-08-22T17:30:00.000-07:002013-06-21T09:11:34.189-07:00<div style="text-align: justify;">All of the credit for this handsome find goes to Levina. And look, guys, the list has passed 20! After months of dragging my feet, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57q3kq4FP2o">this bitch is finally legal</a>.</div><br /><b>HISTORIC BONER NO. 21</b> Vivien Thomas, pioneer of cardiac surgery<br /><br /><b>The Evidence:</b><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqpXu9o-z2JN48M_9Ja6Jvrj5Ul4mzRUURW7c1rAgcWRTI0DQqWaLZYB1M59G0Ylz5x0szRd2qKhg4Q3bdqXv0CZSKW5Z-2JhU3dI3HIOcy7jBIXByEmeFNwPJTodA4Hp3X91Bm8r8q2w/s1600/Picture+3.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqpXu9o-z2JN48M_9Ja6Jvrj5Ul4mzRUURW7c1rAgcWRTI0DQqWaLZYB1M59G0Ylz5x0szRd2qKhg4Q3bdqXv0CZSKW5Z-2JhU3dI3HIOcy7jBIXByEmeFNwPJTodA4Hp3X91Bm8r8q2w/s1600/Picture+3.png" /></a></div><br />Look, <a href="http://cdn.sheknows.com/filter/l/gallery/denzel_washington_st_elsewhere.jpg">they're</a> stethoscope twins!<br /><br /><div style="text-align: justify;">You gotta give it to Thomas for putting up with all the shit he did in his career amidst the racism of 1940's America. I suppose it didn't help that he worked both in Nashville and Baltimore, but then again my only points of reference for the latter come from a childhood visit to the Baltimore Aquarium and from watching <i>the Wire</i> (Omar don't scare.). I digress. In short, Thomas perfected the surgical procedure performed on patients with <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blue_baby_syndrome">blue baby syndrome</a>, but wasn't given credit for his part in this or his role guiding the surgeons during the surgery (he wasn't allowed to operate as he had only a high school diploma, due to financial complications during the Great Depression). And after training countless surgeons at Johns Hopkins, all the University could do was award him an Honorary Doctor of Laws. Because lawyers perform surgery.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">I wonder what I could do with a Master's degree in museum education... Maybe they'd let me perform minor surgeries, or let me get all up in there like <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Gynaecology-1822.jpg">this dude</a> (though I'd rather pursue my dream of becoming a <a href="http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_is_the_name_of_a_penis_doctor">urologist</a>...). Or at least allow me to stalk the halls for hot, young, available interns...</div><br /><i><b>Next Time:</b></i> An English archaeologist (a <i>layday</i>)Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-53305355433838275432011-07-12T16:44:00.000-07:002013-06-21T09:11:34.167-07:00<div style="text-align: justify;">Hello, strangers! I was watching <i>The Dreamers</i> again last weekend (<b><i>totally</i> relevant</b>) and was reminded in the great <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jXUA3W3iDj4">Matthew-Theo-slapstick-comedy debate</a> of Buster Keaton. And then I stumbled across <a href="http://elgog.tumblr.com/tagged/buster_keaton">this Tumblr</a>, inundated with the actor's boyish good looks. Clearly I don't watch enough early film, as I ask myself how this dude's face could have eluded my long-term memory for as long as it did. And so:</div><br /><b>HISTORIC BONER NO. 20</b> Buster Keaton, American slapstick actor/director/writer/producer<br /><br /><b>The Evidence:</b><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0HBnijgdGtVG3pz5qc2rDvtjxnsF_1UCbsxOpuL_mLfNkeTp7i4FbW67DbQWd9Ljkw1RXfZJ6uE0yoOcVhEWyvRi1s4SQJnil5Fk0W9yY-MkT_-SxUtprYY6KnBx4hrefP1aOUCAo0WI/s1600/Picture+16.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0HBnijgdGtVG3pz5qc2rDvtjxnsF_1UCbsxOpuL_mLfNkeTp7i4FbW67DbQWd9Ljkw1RXfZJ6uE0yoOcVhEWyvRi1s4SQJnil5Fk0W9yY-MkT_-SxUtprYY6KnBx4hrefP1aOUCAo0WI/s1600/Picture+16.png" /></a></div><br />Here, I'll do you <a href="http://pauvremelodynelson.tumblr.com/post/7429855763">that last</a> favor.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: justify;">Another few interested facts, garnered from Wikipedia (as always): dubbing apparently was not always <i>en mode</i> with film. With Keaton's early talkies in particular, he and his fellow actors would perform the script in separate takes in three languages (English, Spanish, and French or German), memorizing the lines phonetically. Random fact number two: as Buster performed all of his own stunts before signing with MGM, he actually broke his neck during the filming of one movie, but didn't realize it until years later. How the hell is that possible. I'm not even putting a question mark on that, because I just don't believe it and, in turn, am making a declarative statement.</div><br /><b><i>Next Time:</i></b> Mum's the word for now, but I will say that there have been too many white dudes on this blog...Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-49148108166957486312011-06-01T18:34:00.000-07:002013-06-21T09:11:34.162-07:00<div style="text-align: left;"><div style="text-align: justify;">Call me biased—and you’d be correct—but I have a problem with adding Lincoln’s assassin to this list. Indeed, in his place one will find mass murderers, colluding colleagues, and some of the worst kinds of racists (those with a pedestal), but I’ve bought into the infallible Lincoln lore and cannot bring myself to post John Wilkes Booth, no matter how handsome he was. So imagine how pleased I was to find—while finally reading Sarah Vowell’s <i><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Assassination-Vacation-Sarah-Vowell/dp/074326004X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1306977428&sr=8-1">Assassination Vacation</a></i> (the last pie-chart fact I attribute to her research)—that John had a brother who could be deemed a winner. Thus, a compromise:</div></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>HISTORIC BONER NO. 19</b> Edwin Booth, American stage actor</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>The Evidence:</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgKu_JrNatt7MuAR0VFvM7bkgzFKc0TONmx9vnmyRWLeZ5pkxTRsWCFdd-fSRH0r-y5Dpv9KWswwa6sfMJFezTOvQOtNTPQqILhpyQuJww9DEyoxnu84T72KCHVQ60Va3uibYHv_9XZUh8/s1600/Picture+12.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgKu_JrNatt7MuAR0VFvM7bkgzFKc0TONmx9vnmyRWLeZ5pkxTRsWCFdd-fSRH0r-y5Dpv9KWswwa6sfMJFezTOvQOtNTPQqILhpyQuJww9DEyoxnu84T72KCHVQ60Va3uibYHv_9XZUh8/s1600/Picture+12.png" /></a></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><div style="text-align: justify;">I just feel bad for Edwin, losing his first (and then second) wife, having to publicly deal with the brotherly association that caused him to momentarily abandon his career. But if that does nothing for you, maybe <a href="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/3/31/Edwin_Booth_with_daughter_Edwina.jpg">this</a> will melt your heart a bit.</div></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b><i>Next Time:</i></b> ???</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-90106560937681291282011-05-02T17:52:00.000-07:002013-06-21T09:11:34.197-07:00<div style="text-align: justify;">Just when you thought this blog <b>was history</b>--BAHHHHHH, just kidding--the <i>saaaaxy</i> is back. Thanks to <a href="http://dreamriot.tumblr.com/">Edmond</a> for this tip, and for being an enabler in my posting of bad puns and lame art history jokes.</div><br /><b>BANGABLE DAME NO. 2</b> Emmy Hennings, Dada performer and poet<br /><br /><b>The Evidence:</b><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjW_TZw5x60f17KldudqDrCbEjIMGfyI50e4YWj4juyeeS2_GYrQ-IBTxChjvQc4rW8jmBxKECZ30UNnH7z1yl-y8C7GcjSBnMSTv1Dw20xjFpEgMOCXXQQ7XsnH0RRsNMNEG9ToUNc1A8/s1600/Picture+3.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjW_TZw5x60f17KldudqDrCbEjIMGfyI50e4YWj4juyeeS2_GYrQ-IBTxChjvQc4rW8jmBxKECZ30UNnH7z1yl-y8C7GcjSBnMSTv1Dw20xjFpEgMOCXXQQ7XsnH0RRsNMNEG9ToUNc1A8/s1600/Picture+3.png" /></a></div><br /><div style="text-align: justify;">On a more serious note (and so I don't get harassed again for seemingly objectifying a woman), I kind of feel bad for Emmy. From an article I read: "She lived on the verge of poverty most of her life, was the victim of male domination (even among some of the Dadaists), was a failure as a mother, and as a stage performer was constantly uprooting and moving without destination or purpose. It is not surprising that she viewed life as senseless and oppressive." And thusly (or for some reason that could not be garnered from a 10-minute speed read) she abandoned Dadaism for Catholicism. Now that--the confirmed sixth-grader in me can agree--is depressing. But at least she had a killer bob and bangs. Total girl crush.</div><br /><b><i>Next Time:</i></b> A dude. That's as far as I've gotten.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-72387772176110297252011-03-06T19:39:00.000-08:002013-06-21T09:11:34.185-07:00This one's a shoutout to the hometown, the City of Brotherly Love. Shoutout number two goes to <a href="http://twohundredfiftywords.wordpress.com/">Miranda</a>, who first alerted me of Cornelius' existence.<br /><br /><b>HISTORIC BONER NO. 18</b> Robert Cornelius, American chemist and pioneer in photography<br /><br /><b>The Evidence:</b><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitLQcOZFqsceXyFOm9MOh3oY69XZWJ8Dvg9Z-SVes8lBj74-wpRNIyftebpmM4CnaT9cRbYBuLim46EGMK0FxGseQB-j6whxj_qtN5ESJEHkh36qOsS3hwU-1HWUwTqzmXuKnHtt1joFc/s1600/Picture+11.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitLQcOZFqsceXyFOm9MOh3oY69XZWJ8Dvg9Z-SVes8lBj74-wpRNIyftebpmM4CnaT9cRbYBuLim46EGMK0FxGseQB-j6whxj_qtN5ESJEHkh36qOsS3hwU-1HWUwTqzmXuKnHtt1joFc/s1600/Picture+11.png" /></a></div><br /><br /><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">For five dollars, you could have commissioned Cornelius to capture your likeness in one of his two daguerreotype studios in Philadelphia. I’m not sure how much $5 was worth back in the 1840’s—though Google tells me an 1840 Liberty Seated dollar could run upwards of a grand these days—but common sense tells me that that is a small price to pay for being in the same room as that face/hair. The reduced exposure time of one minute left so much more time to the imagination, <i>right, right?</i></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><i><br /></i></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">And I don't know where that shot at the work ethic of my fellow Americans came from, though I have been watching a lot of <i>Married...With Children</i> lately...</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br /></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b><i>Next Time:</i></b> Another lady, though I don't yet know whom (don't want to disappoint the straight guys and produce another <a href="http://streetbonersandtvcarnage.com/blog/blog-bangable-dudes-in-history/">"Anne Hathaway's more boring cousin"</a>...)</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-52382283381491429122011-02-21T11:46:00.000-08:002013-06-21T09:11:34.166-07:00I present you not with presidents today, but rather a 2-for-1: the first in both the <b>Notorious Lovers</b> and <b>Bangable Brüdern</b> series. Thanks to Tyler for the initial Bosie tip.<br /><br /><b>HISTORIC BONER(S) NO. 17</b> Lord Alfred "Bosie" Douglas (left), poet, and Francis Douglas, Viscount Drumlanrig (right), politician<br /><br /><b>The Evidence:</b><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7k_lQcaEw5P2_9CvEglHC8Sj5hyN8bsrxwhO15Tim5hk-NIoJwZZu8nBOfgq7DjcMm2ZVCV6GoS1HXLc1Ptvbv9pixbCnh98H1IIy0HpG4zDbClqtIohALG15fA6OnEUsa120Z_YlQYE/s1600/Picture+4.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7k_lQcaEw5P2_9CvEglHC8Sj5hyN8bsrxwhO15Tim5hk-NIoJwZZu8nBOfgq7DjcMm2ZVCV6GoS1HXLc1Ptvbv9pixbCnh98H1IIy0HpG4zDbClqtIohALG15fA6OnEUsa120Z_YlQYE/s1600/Picture+4.png" /></a></div><br /><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: xx-small;">* Of other people</span><br /><br />The Douglas family was a piece of work. Their grandfather died in a reported shooting accident, which many believed to have been a cover for suicide. One of their uncles died during the first ascent of the Matterhorn (a rumored homicide), while another committed suicide by slitting his throat (only years after attempting to abduct a little girl). Their father accused both Bosie and Oscar Wilde of sodomy, a criminal offense in Britain at the time, which prompted such endearing father-son exchanges as "I detest you," "you miserable creature," and "I cried over you the bitterest tears a man ever shed, that I had brought such a creature into the world...you must be demented." And to top that off, Francis died at the age of 27 in a mysterious hunting accident, which may or may not have been a suicide or homicide.<br /><br />And, oh wait, I hate Troy Aikman. His image is now ruining this moment for me. <b>-40.0</b>.<br /><br /><br />That said, I want to thank <a href="http://www.power-animals.com/2011/02/16/book-cover-of-the-day-lulz/">Thea</a> and her blogmates for bringing to my attention <a href="http://curiouspages.blogspot.com/2010/01/boners-more-boners-still-more-boners.html">"The Pocket Book of Boners."</a> Illustrated by Dr. Seuss.<br /><br /><b><i>Next Time:</i></b> An American Chemist and PhotographerAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-63850648388547923682011-02-13T16:50:00.000-08:002013-06-21T09:11:34.178-07:00<div style="text-align: left;"><b>AND</b> the dudes are back! I'm not sure to whom I ought to attribute this tip, other than to a Jezebel thread. Email me if he was your idea!</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>HISTORIC BONER NO. 16</b> Zhou Enlai, First Premier of the People's Republic of China</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>The Evidence:</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUJrgUyibCytxIRmRDtS0OzecWKmLhPzCvdMwqz0hZkA1taWLCR16erYg3ZQS1HATC7bvIUg1tMLVX4e1jd12EVbV4qpcRNyu3KT0DZIibR7gRpeK2Ocummn-t4KEr8eZqXpkoAOdfq10/s1600/Picture+1.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUJrgUyibCytxIRmRDtS0OzecWKmLhPzCvdMwqz0hZkA1taWLCR16erYg3ZQS1HATC7bvIUg1tMLVX4e1jd12EVbV4qpcRNyu3KT0DZIibR7gRpeK2Ocummn-t4KEr8eZqXpkoAOdfq10/s1600/Picture+1.png" /></a></div><div style="text-align: left;">Come on, guys, tomorrow's Valentine's Day. You know you'd rather be cozying up with the "midwife" of the Great Leap Forward than with your boyfriend/girlfriend/cat.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">And I know I'm mispronouncing his surname. I cite poetic license.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b><i>Next Time:</i></b> A Notorious Lover, No. 1 (we're making this a series, guys...)</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-63800453244273130912011-02-01T18:37:00.000-08:002013-06-21T09:11:34.176-07:00'Tis that time of year when the enterprising young ladies of America enable my gluttony. And so, with a mouthful of Girl Scout cookies, I present the first in the long-awaited series:<br /><br /><b>BANGABLE DAME NO. 1</b> Juliette Gordon Low, founder of the Girl Scouts<br /><br /><b>The Evidence:</b><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEherBxCKnZOQ3ahXxDQ3fXYDyYo_fUZSL8kims7LwJs5_j1h6uRR1Y0d-lEUw4rMvYRnvABCl0RUnPICRhwpzo1iNDmhEJnfMj-jnNGl85StCXbOJ4XEj9wEodNWS14TdXDHcXMpDNrfoo/s1600/Picture+11.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEherBxCKnZOQ3ahXxDQ3fXYDyYo_fUZSL8kims7LwJs5_j1h6uRR1Y0d-lEUw4rMvYRnvABCl0RUnPICRhwpzo1iNDmhEJnfMj-jnNGl85StCXbOJ4XEj9wEodNWS14TdXDHcXMpDNrfoo/s1600/Picture+11.png" /></a></div><br />More on the first two points: Juliette and her husband, William, were nearing divorce when he died in 1905, so perhaps her plight in being a single woman was not as trying as for some. <b>However</b>, William apparently left his entire estate to another woman, to which Juliette (later) replied, "No one was going to get away with that!" She fought the system and homegirl took back $500,000, even though it was in settlement money. Bitch still got some of her green, I guess.<br /><br /><b><i>Next Time:</i></b> Communist ChinaAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-77030626882248032002011-01-25T11:59:00.000-08:002013-06-21T09:11:34.190-07:00<div style="text-align: left;">I felt a little unworthy of the cause when I discovered my own "research" had not uncovered the hotness that was the following BDiH. He was instead first brought to my attention by Ingrid, who is herself part of a <a href="http://savenyclibraries.org/">very worthy cause</a> (we history people love our libraries!).</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>HISTORIC BONER NO. 15</b> Lewis Powell, would-be assassin</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>The Evidence:</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWAVeqI5glkqKghu5z7fpYzx6v_8GY3EbHqnW5EVjKfGHeVdHb04kgqRGNRmanrdKk3ObwQEgFMid9NFJntD0Y2LzJQgOTdy_NIq_eZh3ZYemGX7qhXXe-eYGlyUPL03d9QzjCu3SC1zA/s1600/Picture+2.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWAVeqI5glkqKghu5z7fpYzx6v_8GY3EbHqnW5EVjKfGHeVdHb04kgqRGNRmanrdKk3ObwQEgFMid9NFJntD0Y2LzJQgOTdy_NIq_eZh3ZYemGX7qhXXe-eYGlyUPL03d9QzjCu3SC1zA/s1600/Picture+2.png" /></a></div><div style="text-align: left;">Yeah, he was a racist, yeah, he tried to murder someone, and yeah, he had a violent temper, but he wasn't the one who assassinated Lincoln. And he was really, really hot.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">And I'm just going to leave it at that.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><b><i>Next Time:</i></b> It's finally time for the ladies!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-54628728124125680402011-01-12T10:48:00.000-08:002013-06-21T09:11:34.169-07:00<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: orange;">Whoop whoop!</span></b> Shoutout to all the rad sites that have given mention to BDiH in the past few days, and also to everyone who has sent in submissions. My inbox is overflowing with hotness! I promise to be on my A-game and publish the pie charts more promptly, since it will obviously take some time to highlight all of these boners (<b><i>please note:</i></b> I use the term freely to describe hot guys in my everyday speech. I know it sounds juvenile, but then again, I suppose it's an adequate reflection of me). Now to get on with the important stuff!<br /><br />I have had an overwhelming number of suggestions for one dead dude in particular (yes, I have had a similar number for Lord Byron, who I will make mention of shortly). I had no idea there was such a following for this guy! So I want to thank everyone who has submitted his name, and I'd like to give a shoutout to these ladies in particular, since they were among the first submitters: <a href="http://onalea.blogspot.com/">Ani</a>, Jenna, <a href="http://robotcupcake.tumblr.com/">Danielle</a>, <a href="http://www.newenergywriting.com/">Marisa</a> and Emily. Thanks, guys!<br /><br /><b>HISTORIC BONER NO. 14</b> Nikola Tesla, inventor and engineer<br /><br /><b>The Evidence:</b><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhoB3gKnY6gpZET27e2UKwFJZhLj0wxOjfth2tsRboOrNIyZTv5YjtNhvaPV8_uFVepVTAD3bbyf5_mGUsmSkGFsnL_lLZStjCi5HAjB47FOPICImr3WkGlM8ZfQ1DcSDZiHhV40Og2kJY/s1600/Picture+10.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhoB3gKnY6gpZET27e2UKwFJZhLj0wxOjfth2tsRboOrNIyZTv5YjtNhvaPV8_uFVepVTAD3bbyf5_mGUsmSkGFsnL_lLZStjCi5HAjB47FOPICImr3WkGlM8ZfQ1DcSDZiHhV40Og2kJY/s1600/Picture+10.png" /></a></div><br /><br />I don't know why Tesla wasn't on my radar earlier: his belief that women would become the future dominant sex, his revulsion to pearl earrings (sorry, Vermeer), his reasons for being a vegetarian, his Teslascope for communicating with extraterrestrial beings. And though I'm on the fence about this whole celibacy thing, whether or not that makes the unattainable more appealing, it seems the chicks were totally into him around the turn of the century. Though, uh, there was that whole pro-eugenics thing...<br /><br />And let's just assume that all posts that follow are "submission editions" for the time being, in light of the number of excellent tips I have received.<br /><br /><b><i>Next Time:</i></b> American Would-be AssassinAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-40769754733300144412010-12-26T22:53:00.000-08:002013-06-21T09:11:34.159-07:00<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: purple;">Bangable Family Edition! <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: black; font-weight: normal;">With the impending royal nuptials and after having trolled the British line of succession for a few hours (did you know that <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Line_of_succession_to_the_British_throne">the list</a> numbers in the thousands?), I decided to introduce some patrilineal love here on <i>BDiH</i> with the Houses of Windsor and Holstein-Gottorp-Romanov. And since I <a href="http://bangabledudesinhistory.blogspot.com/2010/10/historic-boner-no_6978.html">have already profiled</a> Edward VIII, he's included here in spirit but not in pie chart.</span></span></b><br /><br /><b>HISTORIC BONER(S) NO. 13</b> George V (right), George VI (not pictured), and Nicholas II, Eurasian monarchs<br /><br /><b>The Evidence:</b><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgighRaQYYzubcldRuf7NLA101cbwdRgw9GXyl1NQj-81ITvOGkF94Foy2CPs13IDVWAgyHyxs2eCcX8QvBWrj_S0LvHYE94ueN-pArwNdYGJ9IMz2smkuxdOl_QX230VdMsp6MVgmjIDI/s1600/Picture+10.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgighRaQYYzubcldRuf7NLA101cbwdRgw9GXyl1NQj-81ITvOGkF94Foy2CPs13IDVWAgyHyxs2eCcX8QvBWrj_S0LvHYE94ueN-pArwNdYGJ9IMz2smkuxdOl_QX230VdMsp6MVgmjIDI/s1600/Picture+10.png" /></a></div><br />Speaking of bigamy, did you know that Bormann and Himmler were pushing to legalize polygamy in Nazi Germany? The theory was that women would greatly outnumber Nazi men after the war due to the death toll from battle, and thus all of those able wombs would go un-babied. So in order to Aryanize the planet, men would be able to adopt multiple wives. And as a sort of conciliatory prize for women's submission, the first wife would be given the title "Domina." You know, <i>the </i><i>master</i> of all the other bitches.<br /><br />And <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:The_Independent_Air_Force_Dinner_-_Prince_Albert,_Trenchard_and_Courtney.jpg">here's</a> George VI (then Prince Albert) with some unibrowed dude named Courtney. And some other guy.<br /><br /><b><i>Next Time:</i></b> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="text-decoration: line-through;">An American Poet</span> ... I've received an overwhelming number of submissions for a certain individual, so the poet in question will have to wait ... but the latter will be up this weekend, I promise (submission edition!)Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-30828895353387120552010-12-11T12:48:00.000-08:002013-06-21T09:11:34.154-07:00<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: orange;"><b>Submission Edition!</b></span> This four-eyed boner comes courtesy of <a href="http://thenormalmachine.wordpress.com/">Michael</a>.<br /><br /><b>HISTORIC BONER NO. 12</b> Dmitri Shostakovich, composer<br /><br /><b>The Evidence:</b><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBH3IyeKm4iiQa78V5CTRv79SbcuDsHDEvxEygCb1o4SUsFZRR5p1Vtb1GSUVUPt3TddjZFrsq7H1ACeYC2j8F7-YcxurCkVMohUWvm3Ee_oOQAc4Rd7XKk0pxJyxkT4tsHvUAngoIPgA/s1600/Picture+16.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBH3IyeKm4iiQa78V5CTRv79SbcuDsHDEvxEygCb1o4SUsFZRR5p1Vtb1GSUVUPt3TddjZFrsq7H1ACeYC2j8F7-YcxurCkVMohUWvm3Ee_oOQAc4Rd7XKk0pxJyxkT4tsHvUAngoIPgA/s1600/Picture+16.png" /></a></div><br />And in spite of chronic ill health, several heart attacks, and a late-in-life diagnosis of polio, Shostakovich never gave up his vodka or cigarettes. Such a total old-man, Soviet hipster.<br /><br />He later died of lung cancer.<br /><br /><b><i>Next Time:</i></b> ??? (it'll be a surprise--to both you and I)Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-66534918331758583252010-11-22T23:11:00.000-08:002013-06-21T09:11:34.180-07:00<b>HISTORIC BONER NO. 11</b> Shah Jahan, Mughal Emperor<br /><br /><b>The Evidence:</b><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi27yQj4K0WmH5bSwMeWLytUK72WLd03znrAiF45nJqINgEHGqO7UdqcFGQ7cYR3PRRoqWx3hRiWj3CeH69OoVutFN1zy7OJVPZt4-uKDBhoMfKd8tZkMrFo65vBjYRpJeur11h49Mels0/s1600/Picture+5.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi27yQj4K0WmH5bSwMeWLytUK72WLd03znrAiF45nJqINgEHGqO7UdqcFGQ7cYR3PRRoqWx3hRiWj3CeH69OoVutFN1zy7OJVPZt4-uKDBhoMfKd8tZkMrFo65vBjYRpJeur11h49Mels0/s1600/Picture+5.png" /></a></div><br />Yeah, yeah, we all get the hypothesized romantic provenance of the Taj Mahal, but what I'm more intrigued by is Shah Jahan's rumored black Taj Mahal, which he wanted to build directly opposite the one that stands. An art history professor went into all the theories behind the latter in undergrad, <i>but</i>......that education was a waste on all levels, since I forget what she said. <i>Why isn't Wikipedia more thorough?</i> Just when I thought I could get by on my laziness...<br /><br /><b><i>Next Time:</i></b> A Soviet Composer (submission edition!)Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-89144750762552858432010-11-09T18:53:00.000-08:002013-06-21T09:11:34.196-07:00<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">Submission Edition!</span></b><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"> </span></b>This dead boner was suggested by <a href="http://marycaple.tumblr.com/">Mary</a>, and he was an obvious choice, given his title.<br /><br /><b>HISTORIC BONER NO. 10</b> Evander Berry Wall, King of the Dudes<br /><br /><b>The Evidence:</b><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSz3mAptAP26UIsRUDEHMyqv49JR43mxL7FR8f1YR2MaPfdSGXewWmGvMEpyxmxumYiGrA1aFdjzBCH81w96TOZtTaVauwX6qR3LIQjEaxLUBlxmM2JTg09C3t4Lh3Q1DIqy7jWmrpNz0/s1600/Picture+6.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSz3mAptAP26UIsRUDEHMyqv49JR43mxL7FR8f1YR2MaPfdSGXewWmGvMEpyxmxumYiGrA1aFdjzBCH81w96TOZtTaVauwX6qR3LIQjEaxLUBlxmM2JTg09C3t4Lh3Q1DIqy7jWmrpNz0/s1600/Picture+6.png" /></a></div><br />Became a millionaire via his inheritance before the age of 22, but "squandered nearly every cent [of it] on pleasure" by the time of his death. That is the kind of $ugardaddy I need to find/seduce/acquire.<br /><br /><b><i>Next Time:</i></b> The Mughal EmpireAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-80182060840508756142010-11-08T16:33:00.000-08:002013-06-21T09:11:34.192-07:00<b>HISTORIC BONER NO. 9</b> Denys Finch Hatton<br /><br /><b>The Evidence:</b><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcjDx0F3JHb11TgSuCKQ2u7p-ZKb6ANM0IWcvmHAeH3Hbp-KyCH8F1DSIi_iZhDpe7LlJAUwprz9WYyCCx-ksaCMdXs7b9QyUncVmm-RLBdM-Y6J_V9i15HbWdVdqGC_4nP0ThXlY42oI/s1600/Picture+6.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcjDx0F3JHb11TgSuCKQ2u7p-ZKb6ANM0IWcvmHAeH3Hbp-KyCH8F1DSIi_iZhDpe7LlJAUwprz9WYyCCx-ksaCMdXs7b9QyUncVmm-RLBdM-Y6J_V9i15HbWdVdqGC_4nP0ThXlY42oI/s1600/Picture+6.png" /></a></div><br />I didn't realize how hard it would be to pinpoint sexy attributes of Mr. Finch Hatton. I mean, I guess I didn't pick up on the fact that Redford's character was a big-game hunter in <i>Out of Africa</i> (to be honest, I fell asleep and didn't finish that movie, <i>so...</i>). And he has <i>The Rime of the Ancient Mariner</i> engraved on that obelisk of his? I fucking hated that poem. <b>-30.0</b>.<br /><br /><b><i>Next Time:</i></b> A True NY Dude (submission edition!)Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-80643446110826902992010-10-27T18:48:00.000-07:002013-06-21T09:11:34.194-07:00<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: orange;">Submission Edition!</span></b> This one's for you, <a href="http://grey-garden.blogspot.com/">Jennifer</a>. Hope Evan's cool with it.</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br /></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b>HISTORIC BONER NO. 8</b> Eugene V. Debs</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br /></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b>The Evidence:</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjr8g0EHN9Dqmwa7j2VS5f9O2ROYPFDb-DYdGtwdGcmTgLjyaMbgvnEQMyTEVrPRAtHZ4nAJknn2Xxdc5BOhECa3__GxLWUqi5a3qnG3gSJ7H5WDTusjsfm3Iy-bIyK5IqgkEI_bw6FhCM/s1600/Picture+4.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjr8g0EHN9Dqmwa7j2VS5f9O2ROYPFDb-DYdGtwdGcmTgLjyaMbgvnEQMyTEVrPRAtHZ4nAJknn2Xxdc5BOhECa3__GxLWUqi5a3qnG3gSJ7H5WDTusjsfm3Iy-bIyK5IqgkEI_bw6FhCM/s1600/Picture+4.png" /></a></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b><br /></b></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b><br /></b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: center;"></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">Even though he and my boo, Woodrow, shared a mutual dislike for one another, Eugene seemed rather modest and committed to defending civil liberties, so I can get behind that. Get it? <i>Get "behind" that?</i> Not really, okay...</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br /></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">And I apologize for the small photo; Eugene began balding before there was much photographic evidence of his existence. At least photographic evidence available on the internet.</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br /></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b><i>Next Time:</i></b> Colonial Africa</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-39984126182585491742010-10-24T13:52:00.000-07:002013-06-21T09:11:34.158-07:00<b>HISTORIC BONER NO. 7</b> Aisin-Gioro Puyi (a.k.a. the last Emperor of China)<br /><br /><b>The Evidence:</b><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZ8iJliYHsvpkvivaTlOF5hedBhFT6BXKCk1u0yjW5IGq_EUt52WvspqP-DSN7Ki2A8-g5KGmVbyAqKnzAEdSy5UHUvHrcC7W8d4OoyfF7kRy3jYykloEMlKyNWboKcf8O_G04k_28Cjg/s1600/Picture+4.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZ8iJliYHsvpkvivaTlOF5hedBhFT6BXKCk1u0yjW5IGq_EUt52WvspqP-DSN7Ki2A8-g5KGmVbyAqKnzAEdSy5UHUvHrcC7W8d4OoyfF7kRy3jYykloEMlKyNWboKcf8O_G04k_28Cjg/s1600/Picture+4.png" /></a></div><br />I love that his circumstances drove his first wife to an opium addiction (does that make me a bad person?). But no offense, that Bertolucci film put me to sleep.<br /><br />And, yeah, I get the fact that he was supposedly impotent. WHATEVER.<br /><br /><b><i>Next Time:</i></b> The American Labor Movement (submission edition!)Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-6085192900767106682010-10-22T17:25:00.000-07:002013-06-21T09:11:34.175-07:00<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: purple;">Submission Edition!</span></b> This one goes out to the always rad <a href="http://jenniferyumyums.wordpress.com/">Jennifer C.</a>, who has a "Hot Dead Dudes" folder on her computer and dug out the following photo for our enjoyment.<br /><br /><b>HISTORIC BONER NO. 6</b> Ioseb Besarionis dze Jughashvili (a.k.a. a younger Joseph Stalin)<br /><br /><b>The Evidence:</b><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTMtrxrQ8IfJOX53-zCLQMVR4PJXj0Ac24a9GVrlCTXfs4X-85sVpGMRP6V6pbZ_SJ1tNh7DmoQ0lBOGG_Pdtq4HRuXtzfEQ3ZgNI1vRkosDhCKhYBNzqD25LW6Dvhy1wZWcX_dBtnNYw/s1600/Picture+1.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTMtrxrQ8IfJOX53-zCLQMVR4PJXj0Ac24a9GVrlCTXfs4X-85sVpGMRP6V6pbZ_SJ1tNh7DmoQ0lBOGG_Pdtq4HRuXtzfEQ3ZgNI1vRkosDhCKhYBNzqD25LW6Dvhy1wZWcX_dBtnNYw/s1600/Picture+1.png" /></a></div><br />Seriously, just <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJepztBK-ypw9DiJq_eS0TqzotjEtdGv4ydQLbQTabxThoU-shzbeq0hGSG2e29UbhExxRs1SeFAV1rNNei3sKIL_iKzt9JfpKUdaOo2OIAT8DCxFtIpzA-jjG4IZKtetkMl6dSVWfLWJT/s1600/Baptiste+Giabiconi+after+Dior+Homme+Show+03.jpg">add a mustache and some facial hair</a>, and you've got the second coming of Uncle Joe, pre-Revolution.<br /><br /><b><i>Next Time:</i></b> (Post)Imperial ChinaAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-4978826005139634662010-10-21T21:27:00.000-07:002013-06-21T09:11:34.164-07:00<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b>HISTORIC BONER NO. 5</b> General William Tecumseh Sherman</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br /></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b>The Evidence:</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyzQNGCyjwZTHpQ_AyhvkoFnk3uF1Thd4t6Fye4o3vK0133ORm49L-JMLIrFts7j-vMLnWvQZMFPF5JUb8dDoh_OMxbCxS30oQmkSIaW5eINoJ2fqFedLzTplzu8Ho19_qoF-j6nkMtwaC/s1600/Picture+1.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyzQNGCyjwZTHpQ_AyhvkoFnk3uF1Thd4t6Fye4o3vK0133ORm49L-JMLIrFts7j-vMLnWvQZMFPF5JUb8dDoh_OMxbCxS30oQmkSIaW5eINoJ2fqFedLzTplzu8Ho19_qoF-j6nkMtwaC/s1600/Picture+1.png" style="cursor: move;" /></a></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br /></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">I'd like to deviate from the established formula for a moment to state that if I were alive and legal during the American Civil War, I would have abandoned my job as a mill girl (given my ethnicity and family's socioeconomic background) in order to become a battlefield nurse or something (a.k.a. troop prostitute), just so I could stalk Sherman. <i>Hello?</i> <b>HE'S A GINGER.</b></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br /></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">And do you like how my pie chart is confused by negative values? <i>Oh, Daytum...</i></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br /></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><i><b>Next Time:</b></i> The Soviet Union (submission edition!)</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-3646800908100701542010-10-21T13:44:00.000-07:002013-06-21T09:11:34.156-07:00<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b>HISTORIC BONER NO. 4</b> Edward VIII of the United Kingdom</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br /></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b>The Evidence:</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgk4v2hXTxTl9ft21T3G_NCpV0axxLhnSTM5u_XyL97WupyysGalwAGPcpk3LuWpaA4sjxRF63SMWMfXKbSvhddiFtqVXWMhAgGJhRjY8gT6RxTZxBTSLBCyMeIwk8TPxb211oNX2StdFCM/s1600/Picture+4.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgk4v2hXTxTl9ft21T3G_NCpV0axxLhnSTM5u_XyL97WupyysGalwAGPcpk3LuWpaA4sjxRF63SMWMfXKbSvhddiFtqVXWMhAgGJhRjY8gT6RxTZxBTSLBCyMeIwk8TPxb211oNX2StdFCM/s1600/Picture+4.png" style="cursor: move;" /></a></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br /></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">If we don't count the whole appeasement and pro-Hitler thing, abdicating one's throne for one's true love (even if she is <i>uggerrrs</i>) is pretty romantic and admirable. Thinking the former is why he was "banished" to the Bahamas, but no man's perfect, <i><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XtLXGQu-OF4">doyouknowwhatiamsaying</a></i>?</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br /></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b><i>Next Time:</i></b> The American Civil War (my favorite boner yet, friends...)</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-57046167445305138932010-10-21T13:29:00.000-07:002013-06-21T09:11:34.173-07:00<b>HISTORIC BONER NO. 3</b> Samuel F. B. Morse<br /><br /><b>The Evidence:</b><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbctAa8OS3dJJVUa9vJjwXQnAmJzt72OFOR3sDbiXBnIz49ZVHRicl-_wGYbKSGL-yrE8t5mxruMmKU_RjTO8nsezG4w23kes3sWronfoWRgL_DnozHlYR32m5hvn_U0bXUAVCZPx9jcY/s1600/1.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbctAa8OS3dJJVUa9vJjwXQnAmJzt72OFOR3sDbiXBnIz49ZVHRicl-_wGYbKSGL-yrE8t5mxruMmKU_RjTO8nsezG4w23kes3sWronfoWRgL_DnozHlYR32m5hvn_U0bXUAVCZPx9jcY/s1600/1.png" /></a></div><br />Uh, despite his whole anti-Catholic, anti-immigrant stance (I was raised Catholic and my maternal grandparents were OTB Irish, <i>so, uh, yeah...</i>), that coiffed hair is pretty sexy, <i>no?</i><br /><br />Hence why I said he was "bangable," not "boyfriend material."<br /><br /><b><i>Next Time:</i></b> The Windsors, pre-William and HarryAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1417484352309792949.post-69811350419871478712010-10-21T13:24:00.000-07:002013-06-21T09:11:34.183-07:00<b>HISTORIC BONER NO. 2</b> Jean-Paul Marat<br /><br /><b>The Evidence:</b><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZ0QVQgpnMAyBAjvZLYCM9Mtyrwg4eXjyD9BKKaUBIWB4DqmLjnGBas8N2UZCWxxxsk1NK_jhbw1oKDfTNWrGtqfmPFDhYyohdWyo5-79NLlD59HuNbRsjvQvGLtt4GBYDxFpPhpoHDuk/s1600/Picture+3.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZ0QVQgpnMAyBAjvZLYCM9Mtyrwg4eXjyD9BKKaUBIWB4DqmLjnGBas8N2UZCWxxxsk1NK_jhbw1oKDfTNWrGtqfmPFDhYyohdWyo5-79NLlD59HuNbRsjvQvGLtt4GBYDxFpPhpoHDuk/s1600/Picture+3.png" /></a></div><br />If you ignore the whole debilitating skin disease thing--and avoid all other depictions of him--he has the makings of some <i>"Grade A" French Fillet.</i><br /><br /><b><i>Next Time:</i></b> The Age of American InventionAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11998689376612399312noreply@blogger.com